In 90 days, I managed to land a tolerable job and secure a house.
Yes… you heard me… A house (Imagine Craig’s house from Friday without the drive-by’s.) I’m here now. I’m officially and legally bonded to Los Angeles.
Never have I ever worked, slaved, prayed and sweat so much since I moved out here. I’ve spent weeks hating, comparing and complaining about LA.
“Too much sun here, where the rain at?
“Did I just get fired from my job through text message?”
“You don’t really expect me to eat pizza from here do you?”
” Did I just get fired from another job?”
” Wait, did that homeless man just slap the hell out of a random person?”
“Why don’t I have a Netflix Series yet?”
I’ve had thoughts of going back home. Many thoughts. How comforting it would be to just nestle up with my mommy at her house, or just go back to Brooklyn working at the dysfunctional 9-5 I was desperately trying to run away from. I know New York and I know Durham, North Carolina. My experiences there have been easy and forgiving.
Then, I saw him. No… not Childish Gambino (still awaiting that glorious moment.) The stand-up comedian from Winston Salem, NC who moved to Los Angeles with a one-way ticket his sister brought him. He’s managed to gain his own HBO Stand-up special and score an NBC sitcom named after him. It was Jerrod Carmichael’s interview I watched the night he inspired me to buy my one-way ticket and there he was sitting 10 ft away from me in one of the most famous comedy clubs in the world.
I did nothing. I said nothing. Why? Mainly because I thought if I did say something it would kinda go like this…
“IT’S YOUR FAULT, MR. CARMICHAEL IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT I’M OUT HERE STRUGGLING, I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!
I don’t think that would have been the best approach . So I ended up glancing over at him every minute and a half and continued enjoying the Comedy Roast that was going on before me.
That night was awesome. So much comedic energy in that room. From inconspicuous glances to Jerrod Carmichael to accidentally bumping into Bill Bellamy. That night in the Comedy Store was the first time I felt like I was in right place at the right time. I have nothing stopping me or holding me back now.
I’ve been scared shit-less since this new journey but…
“I’m still standing, I’m still strong” (Love that movie!)
Maybe, just maybe… Fear isn’t so bad after all. Fear has lead me to LA, fear has allowed me to experience things I never have before. This whole time I’ve been trying not to be scared when being scared is what’s been pushing me to go harder. If you love something, truly love something and you don’t have knots in your stomach when you think about it then you aren’t passionate enough about it. I’m slowly falling in love with Los Angeles but more so I’m falling in love with myself. Discovering new traits and abilities I never would have discovered if I didn’t come here. Yes, becoming a comedy writer is my dream but I’m more so intrigued with who I’m becoming as a woman, as a human being.
I was sweeping my porch the other day, I paused, looked around and realized I had a front yard. I didn’t have that four months ago.
As my birthday approaches in four weeks, I’ve picked up on a few life lessons I believe can save the world. I’ll get to that in my next blog, but for now if you are thinking about moving, about leaving home and doing something different, being somewhere different. Go. Do it. Young, old, with kids or without. Make a change for you. I promise you’ll have no regrets. The only regret you’ll ever have is not going for it. If it doesn’t work out, I’ll buy your one-way ticket back home ;-).
*Side Note: Gotta give credit to all the people who transferred funds into my account and the people who encouraged me. Forcing me to keep going. Also it wouldn’t even be remotely possible for me to go through all this without a few angels looking out for me. Thanks to the big guy or girl upstairs!